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Benji Poffenroth

by Chris Cook
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Benji Poffenroth by Chris Cook

Little Benjie Poffenroth
was such a sneaky kid;
he didn’t want to go to school,
so here’s what Benjie did:

He went and dumped a big ol’ bowl
of oatmeal on his face,
and let it dry until it formed
a crusty, gross disgrace.

It only took one look to nearly
make his mom collapse.
She thought, “Oh no! My baby boy’s
got leprosy, perhaps.”

The doctor took a careful look…
and then he took another.
He scraped a sample off the cheek
to show to Benjie’s mother.

The doctor smiled and said that all
her worries had been hasty.
He popped the sample in his mouth
and said, “It’s rather tasty!

“Yes, Benjie should return to school—
he’s played a little trick.”
But seeing what the doctor did
made Benjie’s mom get sick.

  — Chris Cook

Copyright © 2004. All Rights Reserved. From Rolling in the Aisles: A Collection of Laugh-out-Loud Poems. Running Press. Reprinted by permission of the author.

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From Rolling in the Aisles: A Collection of Laugh-out-Loud Poems

Rolling in the Aisles, “King of Giggle Poetry” Bruce Lansky’s fourth anthology of humorous poems for children, contains funny poems selected by a panel of more than 1,000 elementary- and middle-school students. Shel Silverstein, Jack Prelutsky, Bruce Lansky, Kenn Nesbitt, Ted Scheu, Robert Pottle and Dave Crawley all made the cut for this giggle-packed anthology of rhymes!

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About the Author

Chris Cook is Spokane’s current Poet Laureate. His first collection of poetry, The View from the Broken Mic, was published in 2012 (Gray Dog Press). Additional work has been published by Sage Hill Press, Scablands Books, and The Spokesman-Review. His children’s poetry has been published by Little, Brown Books, Meadowbrook Press, and Scholastic Press. His latest collection, Damn Good Cookie, was released in 2016 by Korrektiv Press.

Chris competed in the 2013 and 2014 National Poetry Slam, and was the winner of the Limerick Slam at the 2014 Individual World Poetry Slam. He’s also the host of 3 Minute Mic, Auntie’s Bookstore’s poetry open mic, and he co-hosts Broken Mic, Spokane’s longest-running poetry open mic.

When not writing, Chris plays trumpet in the Spokane Symphony and teaches music at Gonzaga University. He has toured the U.S. and Europe as a professional yo-yo demonstrator, and was once a nationally ranked foosball player.

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